[Albert]

I shouldn't do this, but, nevertheless, I have to reveal why Mitch is not here on his birthday.

Rumour has it that he left the US with a suspicious package containing potentially radioactive material: some say donuts, others believe plutonium, I know plutonium-glazed donuts.



No matter what he told you, we have no idea where he's gone. He was seen for the last time last Friday, outside the department of chemistry of Berkley University with the said package close to his chest (literally).

Then, he disappeared and the chase began. The Interpol is looking for him in Central America, after an anonymous call reported to have seen him on a beach in Aruba.



Russian secret service thought to have found him in Kyrgyzstan, but they are rumoured to have miserably failed.



South Koreans are scarred he may try to introduce the donuts in North Korea, where plutonium is, obviously, much more important than food. How can you blame them?
Consistently, they have increased security measures on the border.



CIA need your help too. Please, call 1-800-I-Have-Seen-The-Radioactive-Donuts-And-I-Am-Not-Drunk, if you have useful information.

Thank you for your attention.

Albert

[lemonoman]

Albert, I called the number, but it was for a naughty-chat-line.  Are you sure you typed it correctly?  Not that I don't need companionship, but that's not number one on my priority list

Also, those donuts look just like the ones I ate this morning.  But I'm pretty sure mine were spiked with Thorium 228, not plutonium.  What a relief!

[constant thinker]

If your donut that you ate in the morning looked like that one, but is black...

Is that a sign of the air around it ionizing, and burning the donut?

I think I saw him here though...

[Donaldson Tan]

LOL

[Equi]

Late Happy Birthday Mitch!

I'd say it was Polonium. Now we know who was responsible for Litvinenko's assasination. 

[Mitch]

Thanks guys, really appreciate it.

[ximik]

Happy Birthday Mitch.

BTW, I am from Kyrgyzstan and will be glad to see you there but without polonium:-))

[ximik]

And Albert, that picture...you are creating wrong opinion about Kyrgyzstan by putting a picture of a cattle market and writing that this is Kyrgyzstan...
I am curious, where the hell did you find it?

[Albert]

I think I typed "Kyrgyzstan market" on Google. However, I didn't want to offend anyone: I'd really like to visit those former parts of the URSS, such as Kyrgyzstan and Tajikistan.

However, to compensate, because I'm Italian, here's an Italian market.

[ximik]

I will be glad to guide you in Kyrgyzstan if you decide to come one day

[Donaldson Tan]

The Italian Market does look like a typical wet market in Singapore.



Btw the sight of donuts makes me really hungry.