[Donaldson Tan]

No wonder David Coulhard was out of the track fast. No Jedi like him. ROFL. I cant imagine how hilarious it would be if David Coulhard must wear Darth Vader's mask to race.

[Donaldson Tan]

One day in the life of Darth Vivien (Darth Vader's sister)

My brother, Darth Vader, is on vacation, so I'm helping him do evil and recruit evil minions while he is away.

So, for all you people out there interested in joining the Darth Vader Evil Army (DVEA), please take a application form from the nearest Darth Vader colony and mail it to:

Darth Vader Evil Army
Secret Headoffice
Somewhere in the galaxy Yoda doesn't know

New recruits will get a shiny black helmet, a mini light-sabre and if you are lucky, you could even get Darth Vader's signature. We can't afford actual size light-sabres for everyone because our budget had been cut this year. Really, my brother may be the powerful dark lord, but when it comes to managing his finances, he is a powerless pork lard. I don't see why he had to spend half the army's budget on a new helmet and suit. His old helmet is perfectly shiny and sparkly. Really, he's beginning to act like a housewife.

Moving on, there have been some complains about the DVEA issued helmets. One anonymous letter came in saying that the helmet is "disgusting". Since I am Darth Vader's deputy and DVEA's welfare officer I am concerned with the well-being of all DVEA's minions. We will try to install more comfortable cushions in the helmets and hire designers to come up with more aesthetically pleasing designs. All DVEA soldiers are encouraged to go to the welfare office and fill in the feedback and suggestions forms and state other improvements you would like to see in the DVEA.

By the way, evil recruit Ka Hee complained that he had some connection problems and hence can't go on msn. See what happens when you don't use the Darth Network? Guess what? Ka Hee is under the contract of the Yoda Network. *rolls eyes* Yoda Network is hardly as reliable as the Darth Network. I advise all DVEA soldiers to switch to Darth network as soon as possible. By the way, Darth Vader would crush the larynx of any DVEA member who is using the Yoda Network or Yoda related services and merchandise.

I have to go conquer a few planets and do evil now. Bye.