[putthehurtton]

Hi there! I'm working on my graduate applications, and I was wondering if anybody here would mind critiquing my statement of purpose!

*MOD Edit -- attached plaintext version*

[wildfyr]

You need a conclusion paragraph.

[Irlanur]

It's not very clear to me in what context this stands. This is not really a cover letter, right? the start seems a bit sudden to me, but this really depends on the rest of the application.

Keep in mind that the most important parts of any communication is the beginning and the end (this is general, it holds for talks, letters, but also guitar solos). I think the end of your letter is actually the weakest part. it seems kind of disconnected to the rest, if you know what I mean.

[putthehurtton]

Yeah, so as part of every application there needs to be a personal statement/statement of purpose, where I say why I'd be a good fit for the program. I've heard that it's really important to include program-specific information, such as what lab you'd like to work in and why. I figured the end was the weakest part, since it's the part that changes with every application. I'm not really sure how to tie it into the rest of the statement.