This is only dissociation of sodiumchloride, no chemical reaction. Here we don't use the word spectator ions.
For exqmple
AgNO3 + NaCl => AgCl(s) + NaNO3.
Sodium and nitrate are spectator, because they stay in solution. Only Silver and chloride form silverchloride as precipitate.
NaCl(aq) + AgNO3(aq) ⟶ AgCl(s) + NaNO3(aq)
NaCl is soluble ionic as is AgNO3 so should be broken up as
Na+(aq) + Cl-(aq) + Ag+(aq) NO3-(aq) ⟶ AgCl(s) + Na+(aq) + NO3-(aq)
So fine I can see Na+(aq) and NO3-(aq) are solvated ions on both sides..
no phase change.
I think that's the normal definition of spectator ions that i'm used to.
Applied where the spectator ions are compound that ionise, so "in" soluble ionic compounds so i.e. as solvated ions, (or perhaps floating around without a counter-ion, still a solvated ion). Or an ionising polar covalent compound like HCl.
You don't count the silver ion and chloride ion in the precipitate , as spectator ions. because they're not solvated ions.
So I agree with that
The solid Na2O will not dissolve as Na2O(aq) it reacts directly to form Na+( aq) and OH- (aq) ions.
I agree, we don't have Na2O(aq) or 2Na+(aq) + O2-(aq). It's not like HCl(which is covalent and ionises) or NaCl(a soluble ionic compound, so ionises). It doesn't "ionise"/dissociate. And is not like NH3(aq)(covalent, but doesn't ionise). It's Na2O(s), a crystal (or amorphous solid).
So in agreement so far.
Na+ is spectator because it is not changed.
The main reaction is
O2- + H+ OH- ( H2O) => 2 OH-
You get from sodiumoxide sodiumhydroxide.
I think perhaps most would disagree with the idea that Na+ is a spectator.
I agree that Na+ hasn't changed oxidation state. And, that a reaction occurred. But it has changed physical state, which means it took part in the reaction.
Also , if you see here
How to Write the Net Ionic Equation for Na2O + H2O = NaOH
Wayne Breslyn
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLNbUC9fhr8He speaks of the "complete ionic equation" (which includes spectator ions)
And he speaks of the "net ionic equation" (which excludes spectator ions)
And he says there are no spectator ions, so for that equation, Na2O(s) + H2O(l) --> 2Na+(aq) OH-(aq)
I agree that Na2O does split/dissociate/ionise, as part of the reaction. But I think to be a spectator ion, it has to split before the reaction. i.e. it has to be in split form as a reactant. (not just in the products).
Thanks