[Alpha-Omega]

A woman's husband was cheating on her. The woman and her husband got a divorce and the woman went on with her life hating her ex-husband. One day she found a beautiful lamp lying in the streets. She picked it up and rubbed it a little bit. Suddenly, a genie popped out of the lamp! The genie said that it would grant her 3 wishes & that with every wish her husband it get the same thing only double!

So, the woman thinks of a first wish...

"I want to be rich!!!"
So, the woman became rich, and the husband became twice as rich!
So, the woman thinks of a second wish...


"I want to be beautiful!!"
So, the woman became beautiful, and the husband became twice as beautiful.

"Okay", the genie says. "This is your last wish so be careful what you wish for!"
The woman thinks real hard and finally comes to a decision.

"I Want You To Scare me HALF To Death!!"

[Arkcon]

A man was walking along a beach when he tripped over a metal lamp.  When he rubbed it, a genie rose out of it, stretched, and thanked him for releasing him from eons of captivity, and asked him what he could do to reward him.  The man thought a bit, and decided not to be selfish, He pointed to a map of the Middle East and said, "Can you bring peace to this part of the Earth?"

"They're still fighting?" said the genie.  "They were going at it pretty hard back when I was trapped in the lamp, I don't think I can fix that now."

"Can you make it so that I understand women, then?" the man asked.

And the genie said, "Let me see your map again..."

[Alpha-Omega]

AHHH Battle of the GENIE JOKES...Cool Deal!!!