Re: esters and SN1/SN2
Because SN1 reactions require more easily formed carbocations, such as tertiary halides, they suffer from competing elimination reactions. Although I can't say never, but I cannot think of any preparative SN1 reactions.
SN2 alkylation of carboxylates is a common method to make esters.
Re: coupling reactions
Good question, but I don't know the answer. If I had to guess, I'd be inclined to think it has to do with several issues. Alkyl lithium reagents are generally coordinated as tetramers, hexamers, etc and that may reduce their ability to act as nucleophiles. Another reason may be the degree they may catalyze elimination reactions as well as attack on the halide. In order to attack a carbon, polarization of the bond would probably be helpful, however the more electro withdrawing the atom is, the greater the attack on the halide is likely to be. That is, while an iodide would be a good leaving group, it may also increase elimination and transmetallation reactions.
For the above reasons, use of organometallic reagents may explain their use. If there were a prior transmetallation reaction with a transition metal, this may avoid some of the conditions I have wondered about.